zoe, after throwing a Tootsie Roll wrapper on the floor...

"uh, ozzy, guess what. i just littered."

ozzy, about a recent bad dream...

"i don't want to tell daddy about it. i think it will be too scary for him."

and now, a few words from zoe...

me: zoe, do you want to take a walk later to see the turtle, ducks and geese?
zoe: i don't like the geeses!
you don't? why not?
because the big ones talk to me TOO LOUD!

ozzy wakes me up at 3am...

mom, i just pulled something out of my tushy.
WHAT?!?
oh, it was just a fart.

playing in the sandbox, making a sand cake...

"now we need a bash of baking powder. what a minute! that's not a bash! that's a smidge!"

voicemail left for daddy:

Daddy! I'm home NAKED!
TOTALLY NAKED!
No pants!
No shirt!
No SOCKS!
I'M NAKED!!!!!
(pause)
Kay. BYE!